Friday, 28 August 2015
Tony Abbott, sporting a slender mustache, has reassured the Australian public today that when the Australian Border Farce does in fact invade a city it won't be announced beforehand.
"There were clearly some critical errors made in Melbourne on Friday, a low level official has clearly not understood that we do not talk about operational matters." he said.
Tony, flanked by sixty flags, expressed that holding the people of a city hostage with his armed Gestapo would never be effective if people knew ahead of time that it was going to happen.
"The entire point of this shock and awe scare tactic is clearly lost if the people know it is coming."
Captain Abbott then raised one arm into the air, screeched "Heil Tony" and retreated behind his growing collection of flags.